Julia Fensom - The Baby Consultant

Remember, every time baby wakes is a new opportunity to get it right! To figure out their awake time, better judge their sleep zone etc! It’s never too late and a baby is never “broken” (a phrase a recent client used 😝)

“And a fourth puts the parents at a level of psychopathology similar to the Joker, who just wants to watch the world burn.” 🤣🤣🤣

This made me proper LOL 🤣🤣😍

Lovely midwife and great information provision!

A sleeping baby is a loved baby
As a lot of my interest is obviously infant sleep, I constantly see videos pop up about any kind of infant sleep. And some of those, about co-sleeping or attachment parenting and how anyone who doesn’t subscribe to that ideal of parenting doesn’t love their children as much. That you can only bond with your baby if you wear them 24/7, sleep with them In your arms and feed them every hour.
It’s so ridiculous! They paint a picture of people who’...s baby sleep as uncaring, strict and selfish.
It’s not black and white. I exclusively breastfed my 4 for the first 6 months, every 3.30-4 hours, they slept in the room with me but in their own cot and they all slept through with a dream feed from 10,12,13 & 9 weeks and were all between the 75th and 98th percentile!
And guess what!! I loved them! I cuddled them! It never stopped me carrying them and playing with them! If anything I had MORE energy to do all of that because I was RESTED!! I can be the best parent I can be because I sleep! (Hence the title of my book, “With sleep, I can do anything. The first year- A manual”)
And in terms of the health and well being of the babies.....THEY NEEEEEED TO SLEEP!! I’ll say it again for those of you in the back. They. Need. To. Sleep! Sleep is when they grow Sleep is when they learn Sleep is when they create new memories Sleep is when they consolidate new skills Sleep gets them ready for learning new skills when they’re awake.
It’s for their benefit! Not ours. Parents being rested is a happy coincidence.
And don’t think there’s only one way to “sleep train”. Anyone who says otherwise is uneducated. You have to look at the whole 24 hours. Their whole routine and then discuss the night. And there are various ways to get them self settling WITHOUT leaving them to cry. It can be done!
If you want to know more, then feel free to message me now and please LIKE and SHARE! I’m on a mission to reintroduce sleep to the sleep deprived parents of 2018!! #enjoyparenting
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“Sleeping through”
This is the magical words. The phrase every parent aspires to. And what’s funny, is that it’s kind of a myth!
It means different things to different people.
... To me, I used to refer to it when my kids slept from going down at 7pm to 6am with a dream feed at 10.30pm. (10,12,13 &9 weeks respectively).
For others, it simply means their baby sleeping consistently in the night even though they wake for feeds and then going back to sleep. Because some babies don’t do that. They wake up, feed and then decide it’s play time!
Waking for feeds isn’t an issue until it becomes a habit that the baby has created rather than a physiological need.
But let me tell you a secret. No baby (or adult for that matter) really and truly “sleeps through”. We ALL have sleep cycles and we all rouse between them.
The DIFFERENCE is that some babies (like adults) can put THEMSELVES back to sleep! Others need help. Be that feeding, rocking or cuddling etc. When I rouse in the night and roll over, I don’t need my husband to pat my back until I doze off again! Lol. And neither do babies. They’re incredible creatures and if they can rouse in the night, and then put themselves back to sleep within 5 minutes then it’s surely much better for their sleep hygiene than having to be fed, cuddled, rocked or patted for 30 mins every two hours!
Remember, what do babies do the most of? Sleep. Why? Because they NEED to in order to grow, develop their brain and process all of the new information they are receiving. It is for THEIR benefit, not ours, that they learn to sleep. And it is OUR job to teach them how to sleep!!
👊🏻💪🏻
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Which logo do we prefer? “Like” for 1 and “heart” for 2!

Wow! Achingly true! Women are judged as selfish if they want their child to sleep so they can rest. You can only be the best version of yourself with adequate sleep x

It’s incredible how little fuss is made about this!! And no wonder! If I have a bad nights sleep then I am also miserable, grouchy and I struggle to learn new things! Imagine what happens to a developing brain! It’s not for us parents!! It’s for them! (Although significant reduction in maternal depression is a happy side effect) Babies NEED to LEARN to sleep well so they can grow, adjust and learn and it’s our job to help them! Why is society failing them so much?

Oops! Posterior rotator cuff tear! Ouchy!

I am 100% sure that it has something to do with encouraging babies to feed every minute of the day, so no one sleeps ever!! No wonder women can’t cope! Babies are exhausting enough as it is without being a human dummy! Just because you have a child does not mean you should lose your entire identity. Again, cry one=hunger, cry two= tiredness!! Feeding to sleeping is one of the biggest contributors to sleep problems after 3-4 months! #thebattlecontinues

Baby sleep issues are never irreversible.
Occasionally my clients message me and say that they missed the naps all day, they were out too much in the day and baby was too stimulated and now he’s overtired and crying, “it’s all gone horribly wrong”.
But that isn’t the case. Although they’ll be overtired that day/night, every time they wake up, is a new opportunity to try again. Every nap, every bedtime and every morning is a fresh start.
... With babies you can always “fix” it and although settling might take a few days/weeks to get right, the nap times can be managed day by day!
It’s never permanently gone wrong and as long as your consistently trying to adapt their nap times until they work, you’ll get there!! 💪🏻👊🏻 #enjoyparenting
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Little pumpkin 😍

Very boring video of my 8 month old settling in 15 minutes all by himself. (Speed increased!😝) Just as proof that the lie that babies before one can’t self soothe is just that, a lie. https://youtu.be/PxoAI_Av1mg

🤣🤣🤣🤣 just a little bit of peace....

“Sleep problems” are an interesting thing as many people don’t even realise that their situation might be classed as a problem as they’re told so often that it is “normal.”
Clinical sleep problems are classified as:
Resisting settling... Awaking frequently in the night and needing help to resettle Awaking frequently in the night and not going back to sleep for a long period of time Waking early in the morning Sleeping only 35-45 minutes chunks in the day (catnapping)
These issues are normally mostly attributed to 3 main points:
Under-tired: when your baby has had too much sleep in the day or too close to bedtime so they actually need some awake time which they try and get at night
Over-tired: when your baby doesn’t nap enough in the day or is being picked up too quickly after one sleep cycle so they don’t get a chance to fall back asleep
Parent-infant sleep association: when your baby needs you in order to fall asleep. Be that feeding/rocking/cuddling. Therefore, after they rouse after every sleep cycle (after 3-4 months) they will need you to help with resettling them. This is the only issue that does in fact need “sleep training” although it can be coupled with an under/over tired baby as well.
Sleep training doesn’t necessarily mean leaving to cry. There are many methods out there that can mean you can teach your baby healthy sleep habits without leaving them.
If this sounds like you and your situation then feel free to get in touch and see how I can help you! And feel free to like and share!
Your journey to better sleep starts now!
#enjoyparenting
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Price List:
Sleep consultation via video chat, with follow up email with personalised strategies and one month unlimited contact £70
Antenatal sleep education workshop via video chat with free copy of my book £40... (Better to be prepared and avoid problems rather than wait and have to fix things! Preparation is key!)
Potty training advice and strategy plan via video £40
How much would you spend on a night out? £40-£50? Then why not invest in your futre and for a little bit more, gain an understanding of sleep that will last you a lifetime and transform your life!!
Your journey to better sleep starts now!
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The concept of self-settling was impossible for my first baby and I thought that this would continue to be to be the case with no.2. I thought that babies required the aid of feeding or rocking to sleep which left us (parents) exhausted.



I have contacted Julia who has given me routines, advice and support. Within a week I have a 4-month-old baby who is self-settling to sleep; napping in the day and sleeping through the night! It sounded impossible but with Julia’s flexible approach, excellent advice and encouragement, the baby is rested! I’m extremely grateful and glad that I contacted Julia! Muchisimas Gracias :) !

Baby number 2 is now 7 months old and after as many months with really broken sleep I had been finding it really hard. I also have a 2 year old, so napping in the day and having quiet sofa time isn’t on the cards! ... number 1 slept through from 5weeks!?!



I contacted Julia after reading book after book, googling tips and tricks, trying to swallow the fact she might never sleep through, having friends tell me it’s normal, deciding with my husband we were to have no more children because she won’t sleep, I really saw this as a last resort.



Julia has been so accommodating. Really so so helpful and I’m really grateful. I’ve just started with the tips she has given and my little one is slowly getting it! It’s bizarre!



Julia listened to what I had to say, after I rambled on and on about our current routine. She had so much advice about way to alter what we are doing and it all makes perfect sense.



Well worth it. I always wanted lots of children (which sleep! �) so maybe this is possible!!!



I understand some people can try and survive off of little sleep but I am not a person like that. I started to really reach my limit with the wake ups! And now thankfully I have a plan in place to assist!



Thanks so much Julia xx

The concept of self-settling was impossible for my first baby and I thought that this would continue to be to be the case with no.2. I thought that babies required the aid of feeding or rocking to sleep which left us (parents) exhausted.



I have contacted Julia who has given me routines, advice and support. Within a week I have a 4-month-old baby who is self-settling to sleep; napping in the day and sleeping through the night! It sounded impossible but with Julia’s flexible approach, excellent advice and encouragement, the baby is rested! I’m extremely grateful and glad that I contacted Julia! Muchisimas Gracias :) !

Baby number 2 is now 7 months old and after as many months with really broken sleep I had been finding it really hard. I also have a 2 year old, so napping in the day and having quiet sofa time isn’t on the cards! ... number 1 slept through from 5weeks!?!



I contacted Julia after reading book after book, googling tips and tricks, trying to swallow the fact she might never sleep through, having friends tell me it’s normal, deciding with my husband we were to have no more children because she won’t sleep, I really saw this as a last resort.



Julia has been so accommodating. Really so so helpful and I’m really grateful. I’ve just started with the tips she has given and my little one is slowly getting it! It’s bizarre!



Julia listened to what I had to say, after I rambled on and on about our current routine. She had so much advice about way to alter what we are doing and it all makes perfect sense.



Well worth it. I always wanted lots of children (which sleep! �) so maybe this is possible!!!



I understand some people can try and survive off of little sleep but I am not a person like that. I started to really reach my limit with the wake ups! And now thankfully I have a plan in place to assist!



Thanks so much Julia xx