The Chili Thaiger

3rd attempt, and message getting smaller!! . Pitches this weekend: FRIDAY 2nd Aug. . . . MELDRUM SATURDAY 3rd Aug. . . . INVERURIE... 5pm - 8pm Tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 We'd love to see u all :0 ) . p.s. I hate Facebook !!
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FOR SALE, and with a tear in ma gless ee :0 ) . Before posting on pucker websites, I thought I'd offer this oustandingly awesome yet well-over-the-top garden ornament to lovers of all that's chili !! . Embarrassed to say the following: The item in question has been very well looked after (Decidedly better than Her indoors if truth be told . . . but then again, it never b1tches at me!!), extrememly good condition, never used in anger, pampered to the max, and with sickeningly... low mileage?! Embarrassing :0 ( . Yes it's a veehikyoole . . . A FORD WILDTRAK Pick-up in Chili Orange . . . For those who don't want to stand out in a protected woodland glade ;0 ) With ALL the bells & whistles, this bad boy has only done a mere 31,000miles in its 5 years, spending most of its time as . . . A cherished Garden Ornament. Sale price is £16,500 O.N.O. (NO VAT) If interested, and would like to swing by to give the once over and tik hefor a spinster, please buzz me on 07831 - 240 111 OR . . . Email me on info@thechilithaiger.com . This is an awesome beast and has been an absolut pleasure to own. Unfortunately, the reason for low mileage and ultimate sale? We need a van!! The veehikyoole we should've bought at the offset. Then again, forethought's a great thing is it naecombi . Complete set of Photos to follow on Facebook, or can send via Email. . Share the Love Chili D ;0 )
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After a family weekend away last weekend where it p1ss3d it doon in picturesque Dunoon, we're on it this weekend ye Spiced-up Cherubs ye. Just in case the weather's not quite hot enuff, you'll find us on: FRIDAY 26th July...@ Oldymeldrum 5pm - 8pm Millburn Road... Telling Bone us on 07446 - 88 35 89 . SATURDAY 27th July...@ Inveruhooorie 5pm - 8pm Souterford Avenue Dog & Bone us on 07446 - 88 35 89 . SUNDAY 28th July...@ Ellonyebeautie 5pm - 8pm Broomiesburn Road Tommy Tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 . Or just swing by off the cuff? You're all Mair than Welcome @ The Van :0 ) Cooking up a spice storm is indeedee the order of the day(s) . Sharing the love Dougie & Yo.
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Apologies to all in Meldrum (Friday 19th July) for not informing of the holibonk plans as faffing around getting ready, last minute as usual. Won't make it to Inverurie tonight 20th July. And . . . Won't make it to Ellon tomorrow nigt 21st July coz as said, doon in Dunoon. .... We WILL be back on track next weekend, with the following dates/places covered: MELDRUM 26th July. INVERURIE 27th July. ELLON 28th July.
Dougie & Yo.
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Aye aye spicy cherubs. As Oil & Gas work seems to be getting decidedly busier, we, sorry, Chef, . decided we needed a weekend away, so are doon inDunoon

Here comes the rain doo n doo doo!! Aye ye cannae beat the auld greats, especially in summer, during the kids summer holiboks, in summer. Don't think there's been a dry day since the wee tykes leapt ower the skool dyke and legged it home to the loving arms of their waiting parents, standing at the front door, eager to begin, and enjoy every moment of the next 7 glorious weeks with the fruits of their loins . . . their babies . . . young adults . . . their pride and . . . ach,... who are we kidding, it's 7 weeks of freakin' hell on earth. Peace and quiet my armpit. New levels of disobedience and continual use of that soooo overly used word . . . NO!! Where are these Summer camps them Americans rave about so much??!? That's wot we need over here . . . or even better, send them to the camps over there in the good ol' US? Surely it's got to be worth the money?? Just a suggestion :0 ) . Only 1 pitch this weekend I'm afraid, as Chef is doubled up in pain with a sore stomach today. If recovered by tomorrow, we'll be hitting: SATURDAY 13th July . . . INVEROOHOORIE Souterford Avenue. 5pm - 8pm Tommy tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89. It's a Saturday thing, a banned-from-the-kitchen thing, the done thing. Spoil yourselves and visit THE VAN. Phone in, or pop by . . . you're all more than welcome. YumTumStreetThai Rulz KO. In the meantime, I'll keep popping her full of tabs ;0 ) . Keep sharing that Spicy luv cherubs. Dougie & Yo.
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Chili Thaiger weekend pitches: . Aye aye spiced-up peeps, Please find Chili Thaiger weekend pitces noted below for your delectation: .... Friday 5th July and start of Skool Hilibonks :0 ( Lucky us!! OLDYMELDYRUMDY . . . Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Tommy Tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 Due to the amount of cars parked up by peeps working in local offices on't opposite side of the road, there's a fair chance we'll end up parked up beside the local primary skool ;0 ) But we'll be there or thereaboots :0 ) . SATURDAY 6th July . . . INVEROOHOOOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Dog & Bone us on 07446 - 88 35 89 Or swing by like them Soaps on Ropes!! Koocking's for other day's, nae for Saiterdays!! Well for you guys anywhoose. . SUNDAY 7th July . . . ELLONTOORIGHTWEARE Broomiesburn Road 5pm - 8pm Feel free to buzz us on 07446 - 88 35 89 between the hours of 12pm - 4pm to place an order. Or phone between the above hours. Or just pop on by. All of the above ' good. Here's to a busy wee Sunday nicht in the sprawling toon o' ELLONbyTHONriver. . In the meantime, enjoy the fact it's nae raining, as sure it winna be long afore it starts chuckin' it doon innit. It is kids hols after all :0 ) . Share that spicy love Dougie & Yo. . p.s. I would go cut the grass, but the wife thinks I actually enjoy it !! . Soz for any dodgy typing . . . FACEBOOK SUX.
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Here comes Summer, doo doo doodn doodn doo!! Ah yes, a crackin' summer rocker from back in the day. Aye, ma Dad's day, nae min!! If you're burnt already, it just shows to go your Scottish, you don't listen, and we do get the same sun as them Frenchies in France, but just nae that nasty African breeze that goes with it. . As much as I'd love to take a summer chill pill, go sit in the sun-trapped back garden (Sun screen Factor 0) with a cool 6-pack of Pepsi Max, and Bar-B-Q ma ...little white ankle sox off, I've got catering stuff to be gettin' on with :0 ( . So withoot any further adoodoo's, fingers crossed tonight's a smidgin' busier than last Friday...as painful as it was . . . And Fisher Offshore etc. are kind enough to leave us space for our pitch closer to the main drag :0 ) Let's crack on: . FRIDAY 28th JUNE . . . MELDRUMICUS Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Dog and B us on 07446 - 88 35 89 if you'd like to place a cheeky wee order for pick up at a time that suits you. Looking to seeing all you friendly locals at 'The Van' tonight :0 ) . SATURDAY 29th JUNE . . . INVEROOHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Magic number being 446 - 88 35 89 Chili Thaiger 1 . . . That moody kitchen 0 We're only roond the corner up the lane and along the road a smidgin', so as the lovely Deliah Smith says . . . Let's be 'avin' yooooooooo ;0 ) . SUNDAY 30th JUNE . . . A CHEEKY WEE DAY AFF :0 O But as said, keep a watchful beady eye or three peeled for those sneaky ELLON-lovin' rozzers!! . . Would love to stay longer, but them marigolds dinna rest just coz they're the same colour as the shiny ball in the sky!!?! . Share the Love & Get aboard that Eco-friendy train stopping at absolutely all stations, and do your bit for our pretty raggedy Planet E. :0 ) If not for yourselves, then for them noisy, annoying kids!! ;0 ) They're our future . . . So I keep hearing!! . Dougie & Yo
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CHILI THAIGER's 'REVERSE GEAR' Time for some Wheel Talk!! (If you're into well wkd car stuff that is) .... Believe it or not, filming for FAST & FURIOUS 9 has already beginned, with Dom Dom donning his clean overalls for his 1st scene down in Englandshire somewhere, back in 24th June. . Now I heard a sneaky last week, from Chef of all peeps, that F&F9 cars, all wrapped up, had already started arriving 'On-set' . . . IN THAILAND!! Krabi and Phuket to be more precise. Now she's telling me the Big, bald Lad's already there?! Best stay in her good books and see if she can find out any more goss from the folks back home??!? . All I can say is . . . Let the carage, and sometimes 'WELL off the scale' stunts begin. . ALSO . . . We've seen a sneaky array of unmarked rozzer (police) cars on our travels, the last one being a Red 12-plate Audi A4 saloon in ELLON of all places!! Well they must like it oot there as last Sunday we saw yet another . . . this time an unsuspecting white, 66-plate BMW estate stopping a happily-married ELLON hoodlum for speeding, and a Tesco bag shakedown. They seem to like the road into town from Tesco's!! Just be aware lovely ELLON peeps, they're coming for you.
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Is it officially summer yet? Or is it another on/off/on rainfest to please them fairmer's?! Did I actually see hailsteen's at the back door yesteday??! Guilty all of the above. And today's the longest day already!! WooHoooooooo.... . Well now that we've dealt with summer and the weather, let's get this weekend's pitches sorted oot?! . FRIDAY 21st JUNE . . . MELDRUMICUS Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Dog and B us on 07446 - 88 35 89 if you'd like to place a cheeky wee order for pick up at a time that suits you. Looking to seeing a few friendly locals at 'The Van' :0 ) . SATURDAY 22nd JUNE . . . INVEROOHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Magic number being 446 - 88 35 89 Chili Thaiger 1 . . . That moody kitchen 0 We're only roond the corner up the lane and along the road a smidgin', so as the lovely Deliah Smith says . . . Let's be 'avin' yooooooooo ;0 ) . SUNDAY 23rd JUNE . . . ELLONAYESOYESAY :0 O Broomiesburn Road 5pm - 8pm Please feel free to give us a bell between 12pm and 4pm to place your order for the evening. If we don't answer, we will buzz u back. Or . . . Feel free to drop by for a natter and some affa fine YumTumThai street food. . Would love to stay longer but got a van to fettle wi' ma world famous Marigolds!!?! . Share the Love & Get yourselves all aboard that Eco-friendy choo choo train stopping at absolutely all stations, and do your bit for our pretty ragged Planet E. :0 ) Do it for your little darlin's (Them noisy kids), when you're not trying to lock them in the airing cupboard that is ;0 ) . Dougie & Yo
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Hello gentle town folks of Ellon by the . . . river Y :0 ) It's a No-Show today I'm afraid, but will re-schedule for next weekend, Sunday 23rd June. . It would seem that a Father's Day celebration has been planned (Last minute of course) for today, Sunday 16th June . . . which I believe is, well . . . Father's day!! The painful fact it's now 11.50am, on Sunday 16th June, the organiser's still in bed, and No. 1 son's more interested in helping a friend do whatever, than cooki...ng my celebratory breakfast means, I'm sitting here starving whilst also waiting for my spesh day to start. Just as well I'm used to NOT receiving presents, or cards, and end up paying for those special meals on sooo, sooo spesh days like these, so it doesn't hurt . . . at all !! Anywhoose, would've sent message sooner but internet playing up on lap top, asking for freakin' wireless password!! Ended up searching the whole house looking for 'Removable' plastic tag containing password that slots into back of router that should always be there if removed, by others, but wasn't there!! Then, from nowhere, No. 1 son, who I'd half-heartedly accused of misslaying it earlier . . . walked into the kitchen with it in his hand!!?! "So where did you find it"? I asked in awe. "It was in the back of the router" he said, in absolut disgust. What a total d**k I am !! . Sure I'll be treating everyone to a lovely meal later on today, when of course they're all finished doing what's more important to them than celebrating my alledged 'Spesh day', today Sunday 16th June!! . Hope things work out better your end :0 ) Me, I'm off to make myself some toast :0 (
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Aye aye Chili T cherubs. Yet another week of truly outstanding . . . RAIN. The only ones I can see enjoying this stuff are farmers, and clutches of orgasmic ducks!! By the looks of things, this is summer all over again, one dreech day after anither. There's mair chance of me sitting naked and spread-eagled on a park bench on a HOT summer's day!! wi' ma danglies swaying in a cooling breeze . . . next to a family of over exhuberant squirrels, nut hunting for their winter stash!...!?! than this weather freaking off any time soon :0 ( . Oh well, at least it's nae snowing ??!? . So: Let's be cracking on with this weekend's pitches eh? . FRIDAY, 14th June . . . OLDYMELDRUM Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Telling Bone us on 07446 - 88 35 89 Swing by and pay us a visit at oor hame pitch no matter where u hail from. A warmer welcome than this fartypants weather is always given. . SATURDAY, 15th June . . . INVEROOHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Tommy Tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 Saiterday night is a night for slaving over a hot-lookin' menu, not a soul-sucking kitchen. Let our non-moodie, non-temperamental chef pick up the wok and smack me over the bonce, saving any undue trauma in your hoose!! U know it makes total . . . . SUNDAY, 16th June . . . ELLONONCEMAIR Broomiesburn Road 5pm - 8pm Feel free to gee us a bell on 07446 - 88 35 89 any time between 12pm -4pm to place an order, during the evening, or just swing on by off the cuff. You're all very welcome. . In the meantime, Share that Love, and remember . . . Dolphin's hate plastic...unless it's with chips!! . Dougie & Yo
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SUNDAY 9th June Oh what they hey :0 (

OOps . . . FRIDAY 7th June SATURDAY 8th June :0 ) My BaD !!!!!!

Aye aye Chili T Spice lovers. . Well if the sun's nae splittin' my pavement . . . on a Friday?! What next? A whole weekend of the hot stuff?? A perfect chance to ignore the sun tan lotion I say :0 ) .... Ach well, it is what it is, so best crack on with this weekend's pitches, starting with the cheeky wee parish o' Meldrum!! . FRIDAY 6th June . . . OLDYMELDYRUMBABA Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Dog & Bone is 07446 - 88 35 89 Come on doon and gie us a prod tae keep us awake, reel off some wholesome banter and let us fill your Dolphin-friendly plassy bags with the spicy good stuff ;0 ) . SATURDAY 7th June . . . INVERUHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Last weekend was of course, the Champions League final, memorable for the wrong reasons, or not, depending on your glass :0 ) The only thing to look forward to this evening is a spicy ensemble from the Chili T? So why not tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 OR . . . Just swing on by off the bat. Let the kitchen have a good sulk and allow us the pleasure of making Saiterday night a tad more enjoyable :0 ) Feet up . . . Chili T, Wine, Beer? Water!! Job done. . And lastly... SUNDAY 2nd June . . . A DAY AFF fae the coalface !!
So in the meantime, keep it real ye Aiberdeenshire feels and I'm off to break in another pair of shiny yellow marigolds ;0 ) . "The Chili Thaiger" WkdYumTumStreetThai. RELIABLY UNRELIABLE !! Keep howling . . . and if ye're wetting yersel's, wear rubber panties ;0 )
Share that Love CHEF . . . & ChiliD
p.s. I'm ready to shoot this facebook gubbins and ram it where the sun deffo doesn't shine. This cursor's jumping all over the place!!
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Well what's to say peeps, a steady Saturday night in the metropolis of Inverurie, but ever turning in the back of the mind . . . was? GETTING BACK HOME TO WATCH THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE FINAL with Liverpool v Spurs....WooHooooooo. . Packed up the beast early, and drove home as fast as the beast would safely allow, screeched into the cul-de-sac on . . . 4 wheels, abandoned the van in the drive-way, kicked down the front door, and flopped down on the sofa at 8.01pm . . . just in ti...me to see the recently-awarded penalty given to Liverpool. Bang...in the net. What a start. The promise of a special final may just come true! . . . FAT CHANCE :0 ( Yet another final where the super-hype well outweighed the actual game of 2 dull halves . . . that is until all were treated to one outstanding moment of utter madness. . I had to take a 2nd glance, but there it, sorry, she, was!! 18 minutes in and one Kinsey Volanski took to the pitch in all her glory . . . well almost all her glory!! With blonde hair flowing behind, and a high-cut leotard leaving nothing to anyone's imagination, she glided across the pitch, players lip-syncing WTF as she passed by, before being gently cradled by a steward who brought her to a controlled standstill, before escorting her off the pitch. No rugby tackle to the ground, as you'd expect if some fat ned tried the same move, just a firm grip on reality whilst probably whispering in her ear . . . "So darlin', wot u up to after the game"? . So who is Kinsey Volanski? Is she a footy-final-lovin' beauty who loves to share moments of madness with packed stadiums. U might think so, unless in all the excitement, you happened to notice 'vitalyzdTV' emblazened across her ample chest . . . or so I was told!! . One Vitaly Zdorovetskiy . . .her boyfriend, and all round Youtube good guy. An Ex porn star who became so bored with racking up big viewing numbers on Youtube, and not lieir rules, set up his own adultsite king th "vitalyzd Uncensored". . Was it all a planned stunt to get peeps to visit their individual platforms? I freakin' hope so cos it worked BIG TIME. Kinsey's Instagram following increased by more than 1.5 million. Not bad for 5 minutes work ;0 ) alone . So where did that leave us footy watchers? Well it stopped me falling asleep!!?! . Here's to next years Champon'sLeague Cup Finali . Will it be orig as this years?as bn Not if we have another scantily-clad streaker on titchhhe p, but maybe a brunethe pitch . . . te next time ;0 ) . Well that's my End of Match report, hope u liked it, and apologies for the text going cookoo at the end!! FaceBook, u gotta love it . . . just hope u understand the wonky bits??!?
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Aye aye Chili T Spice lovers. Canna believe it's almost June already. Seems like only yesterday I was sitting watching everyone opening their Xmas pressies as I did a Mother Hubbard on my patch of floor!! . Ach well, it is what it is, so best crack on with this weekend's pitches, starting with the cheeky wee parish o' Meldrum!! . . ... FRIDAY 31st May . . . OLDYMELDYRUMBABA Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Dog & Bone is 07446 - 88 35 89 We hate when it's too quiet, so why not pop down for some crack and let us fill your Dolphin-friendly plassy bags with the spicy good stuff ;0 ) . SATURDAY 1st June . . . INVERUHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Lat weekend was the 4th busy Saiterday evening on the trot in the old Metropolis. It's starting to become quite an enjoyable habit (Less time to fall out with Chef). So . . . Why not tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 OR . . . Just swing on by off the bat. Let the kitchen have a good sulk and allow us the pleasure of making Saiterday night a tad more enjoyable :0 ) Feet up . . . Chili T, Wine, Beer?Water!! Job done. . And lastly... SUNDAY 2nd June . . . ELLONYetAgain !! Broomiesburn Road 5pm - 8pm Feel free to call between: 12pm -4pm to pre-order. Or just pop on by :0 ) Magic number is... 07446-88 35 89 But please don't call between 4pm and 5pm coz there's a fair chance we'll b trucking along the yELLON Brick Road on the way tae El Paradiso. . Note to selves: Due to an expensive DFF (Deep Fat Fryer) giving up the ghost some time back, with a painful tag of a poultry £500 to fix, Pommes Frites I'm afraid, are off the menu until further notice. Ah the joys of a healthy lifestle!!?! . So in the meantime, keep it real ye Aiberdeenshire feels and I'm off to break in another pair of shiny yellow marigolds ;0 ) . And remember . . . "The Chili Thaiger" WkdYumTumStreetThai. RELIABLY UNRELIABLE !! Well if ye dinna laugh, ye'll greet :0 )
p.s. Does anyone know if Amazon sell the old-type garden coal cellars? I feel the need to share a bonding moment at the bottom of our garden with No. 1 son!!?! 15 years old, and an absolut keeper!! And so wise for his years!!?! Actually, I'd rather eat a 5 day old, sun-drenched mixed salad from a pelican's fishy beakpouch, than listen to his ever-constant skull-splitting whining of the word Nooooooooooooooooooo.
Sharing the Love ChiliD & Chef.
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Aye aye Chili T cherubs, Another weekend knocking, and weather's kinda summery, if you like wind in yer willows!! . An impressive turnout in Inverurie last weekend, yet again :0 ) So a big shout out to all who turned out from Meldyrumbaba, Iverurieooo and EllonAtLast . . . Mucho Appreciado kens :0 )... . So this coming weekend is as follows: FRIDAY 24th MAY . . . OLDYMELDYRUMBABA Millburn Road 5pm - 8pm Dog & Bone us on 07446 - 88 35 89 3rd week on the trot . . . & No. 1 son's 15th...Woohoo him!! Should call him The Oracle . . . Seeing as he knows all !! . SATURDAY 25th MAY . . . INVERUHOORIE Souterford Avenue 5pm - 8pm Tommy Tinkle us on 07446 - 88 35 89 OR . . . Swing on by any time. Continue that Boycott on the kitchen and let Chef do the hard graft for you. You'll find me wiping down counters and gazing out my hatch whilst twiddlin' ma digits and trying to spell multi-task ;0 )
SUNDAY 26th MAY . . . DAY OFF !!
Share the Love een an' aw. We're here for ye ;0 )
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